Story 171
Seven years ago I swallowed a bottle of pills in front of my 15-year-old daughter and husband. It had been during an extreme argument with my daughter with her saying she should just kill herself.
I had for years been depressed and had thought of suicide on a daily basis. This was the moment I snapped. In my mind I could think of no other way to get through to her than to dump the bottle full of pills into my hand, take a glass of water, and say "You want to kill yourself? This is how it's done!"
Then I swallowed the pills in front of them.
Then I told them if they wanted to save me to take me to the hospital.
The next day I woke up in a hospital bed. My husband, daughter and younger daughter were by my bed.
Honestly, I was disappointed to wake up. But, then I saw how scared and hurt they were. Then I was sorry for what I had done to them.
Since then I have thought of suicide but know that that it is tragic for the family and is a hurt that can never be undone.
Today I live with the thought that I am here for a reason and when it is God's time to take me then I will go. I do believe living is harder than dying. I do believe I was born for a purpose and when that is accomplished I will be released.
Until then I try to remind myself of how I am blessed and try to appreciate the wonders of the world and the people in it.
Approximately 80 per cent of all firearm deaths are suicides. Nearly 20 per cent of all people who die by suicide use a gun.